Previous History

Here is the history behind the story, and how we got interested in adoption in the 1st place.

7/21/06

Most of you know that Michael and I have wanted to start a family for about 3 and a half years now. We have both been to the doctor and there is nothing that they can find that would point to an exact reason why I haven’t been able to get pregnant.

Michael has been expressing the desire to explore adoption for a few months now. Recently, he has been expressing it more. It hasn't been on my heart as much as his, but my prayer was, “Lord if this adoption thing is really what we need to explore, you are going to need to drop a baby in my lap.”

July 21st (our 5th wedding anniversary) I got this email from a mom of one of Michael's baseball players, Louise Plagman. The woman who sent the email is Denise and she is a long time friend of Louise's from Michigan. The email was updating everyone on her life while she was out in California caring for her mom who was recently diagnosed with Leukemia. She wanted to forward it to us because she thought of us, since she knew we were trying to have children.

Jodi,I am attaching an email from a good friend of mine who currently lives in Naperville, IL. She raised 3 beautiful Christian boys and they are deeply devoted to their faith. She is currently in California helping her Mother through chemo. Just in case you are seriously considering adoption, I thought you might be interested in this letter. It would definitely be a load but I did think of you.Louise

July 20, 2006

Dear Family (eternal and earthly),

Thank you for your prayers, emails, voicemails & thinking and caring for us.

This is the toughest walk I've had to take and it is obviously the toughest for mom. She is in great spirits even though I know she is in a lot of pain at times. So far everything has gone well – the chemo has killed off all of her red & white blood cells along with the platelets & they are infusing her daily to re-grow healthy ones. In about a week they will biopsy her bone marrow and we hope to hear the magic word "remission." Then she will have two more sessions of chemo – as the doctor said, "It's a marathon, not a sprint."

The Lord is so awesome and taking care of every detail -- I've been "sleeping" on a thin plastic mattress on a metal cot next to my Mom's bed – and was feeling like I was on melt down only getting about 2-3 hours of sleep a night. Yesterday, I go back to my apartment (as I do every morning) to shower and help get the kids ready for pre-school. I took the kids to school and started to run a few errands when I realized I was sitting in a parking lot too exhausted to go into the store I had driven to. I returned to the apartment for a nap and a quiet time to ask the Lord "for a word." Biblegateway.com popped into my mind and I grabbed my lap top and Isaiah 41:10 flashed onto my screen as the "verse of the day" -- Fear not, for I am with thee, be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen thee, yea I will help thee, I will uphold thee with my righteous right hand. I return to the hospital to find out Mother's room had a leak in the ceiling and they had to move her to a new room – a double – so I have my own fancy hospital bed that I can play with – it has a lot of buttons – but don't touch the one with the red lady on it – they don't like visitors doing that. I had a good nights sleep last night and I felt almost human today. What an awesome God.

A few of you have asked for a history of how this all started. Four months ago Mom had a physical and got a clean bill of health. Five weeks ago she gave blood and was told she should see her doctor, which she did four weeks ago. He sent her to a hematologist three weeks ago – which is when I flew to California to be with her. They did a bone marrow biopsy and got the results two weeks ago which showed an advanced case of acute leukemia or AML. They admitted her to the hospital the next morning and began, what we have been told, the most intensive chemo treatment on the planet – it doesn't get any stronger than this. She will be here another two weeks and then will move to the apartment that I am renting for recovery before she goes through two more series of chemo treatments. That scenario happens assuming we hear the word "remission." And assuming she survives.

"The kids" I spoke of are my great-niece and nephew who my mother had custody of – they are 2 & 3 and since I have been here, Child Protective Services have taken a 6 month old away from their mother (a half sibling) and placed them all with ME! This is my Mother's very strong desire – to keep them out of foster care. The parents are loosing their parental rights and the kids will be up for adoption within the next six months. We don't have any family members willing/able to care for them and we are hoping to retain control and get them into a Christian home. Mom wants them to stay in the family, but I remind her they will be in our eternal family if they are placed in a Godly home.
She was on track to adopt them – but obviously that is way up in the air right now. They are truly adorable – Joshua, the two year old boy has stolen my heart – he is a miniature jock and loves any ball he can get his hands on. I bought him a mitt, ball and bat, and have been teaching him to swing – don't laugh – I played a lot of soft ball in my day. When he plays for the Cubs I'll be able to say I bought him his first bat and taught him how to use it. We are house-breaking him (I do dogs now—not kids) and when he had a bowel movement in his diaper and I had to change it I told him it was "disgusting" and he said "yeah, disgusting!" I told him I would give him a treat if he would go in the potty instead of his pants and twice he took me into the bathroom to see that he had been successful, when we looked into the white porcelain bowl, nothing was there - his evidence had slipped down the hole out of sight. Determined, he trotted out of the bathroom this morning, turd in a cup, and proudly announced "I caught it with my hands!" He had his proof and we've had a lot of laughs today.

Obviously my hands are full (of three little turds – ha-ha) and Naperville and my precious family seem years and worlds away. My girls are coming to the rescue this weekend and I am so grateful to them for canceling their long made summer-fun plans to spend the rest of their summer days babysitting and caring for me and mom. My aunt from Texas, LeVerle O'Neal is here for the duration too. I never could have done what I have without her. She is an incredible blessing. And so are all of your prayers. I'm very grateful for all of you. Please continue to pray – for wisdom in dealing with placement of the children and for a hedge around my mother's vital organs and for us to hear the word "remission."
I love you all.
Denise

I called Michael and was all excited, telling him he had to read the email I just forwarded to him right away. Michael then responded to Denise that day with this email:

Denise,
I would first like to tell you that my thoughts and prayers are with you, your mom, and the rest of your family. I read your letter to Louise Plagman and other friends about your mom’s illness and the story of the three babies. The Plagman’s are good friends of ours (Jodi and I). I taught Jessica and Tony, and also coached Tony at Wesleyan School in Norcross, GA. Louise knows that Jodi and I have been trying to have children for over three years and have recently discussed adopting children. It just so happens that your letter was forwarded to us on our 5th wedding anniversary, July 21st (a sign!). Jodi and I are believers in Jesus Christ as our savior and only hope. We also believe that he produces miracles and signs all the time. I first hope that your mom, through God’s love and grace, receives a clean bill of health and goes into remission. My other hope is that the three grandchildren find a loving and caring Christian home that makes you and the rest of the family happy. If there is a possibility that you would like to find a loving home for the three kids we would love for you to consider calling us. If you would like to call my wife Jodi her cell number is 678-779-0494. My cell number is 678-779-1065.
In Christ, Michael and Jodi Shaheen
Denise's response was that she didn't think that the state of California would let the kids out of the state. We were slightly disappointed, but it all happened so fast. It definitely sparked a fire in my heart for adoption, and we set out to find out what was available in GA. There had to be similar opportunities with kids in GA. I went to the Perimeter Church website, and they just happened to have an adoption information breakfast that coming Sunday at church that we went to. We were getting more excited and exploring options. Our heart kept leading us to the kids that were in state custody. One, for the reason that they were really in need, and harder to place in a home, and also that when you take permanent custody from the state, there is no adoption fee. So I made some calls from the paperwork we received from the breakfast, and we were ready to find out what we needed to do, and what kind of paperwork needed to be filled out.

Michael calls me today at work and is all excited, there was another follow up email from Denise, and here it is:

8/1/06
Michael and Jodi -- Are you really interested in going forward with this? I talked to the social worker and there is something called an IEP (I have no idea what that is) but it transfers the case to another state if need be -- it can take a few months -- but the mother goes to court on September 13 for her rights to be terminated so the social worker said we should start an IEP asap! All I know is there is a huge amount of prayer cover here and I know God is leading this search for their home. If you are interested -- it could be quite a process but -- call the social worker in charge of this -- her name is Robyn. I will tell her you will call. She will need information about you and may be able to shed more light on the process. My family should not know that I have had anything to do with this -- you will want to remain anonymous to the parents. The kids really are awesome. Josh, the 2 year old, loves any ball you put in front of him and is captivated when baseball is on TV -- we are training him to be a Cubs fan! I asked him what he wants to play when he grows up --baseball, basketball or soccer ball -- he said he wants to play "bouncy ball!" If you are a country music fan -- Lone Star has a song about "a carrot top who can barely walk, with a sippy cup of milk -- and a little blue eyed blonde with her shoes on wrong, cuz she likes to dress herself....." that is my little Joshua and Skylah. Baby Shawn is another carrot top....and a great baby...rarely fussy. But three kids -- three and under is a challenge for anyone -- call Robin if you are interested and if she thinks we can do it -- we'll start sending pictures......God is in control...Denise Holmberg

OK, so now what do we do?........they do not want to split up the kids, and now that I have a visual, I can't bear to see them split up. So Michael called the social worker and left a message. She didn't call back until about 7:00 tonight while I was on the home phone with someone from Bethany Christian Services locally here in Atlanta. To make this long story shorter, Michael is giving our address, and social security numbers, and they are starting background checks and preliminary paperwork. Michael gets off the phone, and says, "You are going to kill me......I just adopted 3 kids". My reaction wasn't what he expected, I just stood there, and I half way believed him. He was half way kidding; he had just started the process. Michael got on the phone to his mom then I got on the phone to my mom, so she could talk me off the ledge. Before I could even ask, she offered to come live with us and help out at least until next summer. She has been out of work, and wanting to move somewhere, but not sure what she wants to do. Hmmm, I think I have something for her to do :)

Please pray for us as we consider completely changing our lives almost overnight. I know that if God is in it, it will happen effortlessly. Michael is being great with this. I am the practical one, he is the "let's do it, then we will figure out how". I am finding all the obstacles, while he is so excited. I will keep y'all posted as we go through this process. Wow, I need to be really careful of what I pray for next time.

8/3/06
Thank you for all your prayers and encouragement. Almost everyone who hears this story says the same thing "WOW". I feel like everyone thinks we are crazy for even considering this. We know it will be work, but then such a reward to see 3 little ones grow up with Christ in their lives. Only with Him would we be able to take this on.

Yesterday I was talking with Louise, the mom of the baseball player who sent us the original email, and I was telling her the latest. I said, “Now we just need to get a mini van”. She said, “We have one that you could use as long as you want”. They have cars for everyone in the family, but have kept the minivan for lugging stuff around, and to register for their 18 yr. old son to keep the rates down. It just sits in the garage, until they may need it. OK, now here is another obstacle that has been removed from our path.......and we continue on.

8/3/06 I spoke with the social worker today in CA. She gave me some good info to have. First, there are some family members that have come forward this week. Some are even from GA. So that doesn't necessarily count us out, as they just came forward, and they haven't checked out yet (ie. background check, that they want all 3 together, they don't want to split them up, etc). They are still in the fact gathering phase. I also asked about paperwork, and she said it would be all CA paperwork, and would take 3 months to 1 year for the process to be finalized. There is a possibility that we would be able to get them as foster kids while we finish the paperwork. That might be a blessing, as it would be a good trial period, and they would pay us while we had them for living expenses and clothing allowances. There is a chance that when the trial takes place, that the judge could decide to give her a trial run for 6 months before deciding on whether to take them away or not. So now we just wait for the trial date of Sept 13th to see what the judge decides, and how many family members are left. Family members get 1st priority, then friends of the family, then they go into the state system. So in the mean time we are going to pursue taking the classes and working through the 6 months of paperwork to adopt in GA. God is in control........part of me feels disappointed, and part of me is relieved. I know it would be a lot of work and our lives would be changed drastically. Ironically Skylah the 3 year old would be just about as old if we were pregnant when we first started. Other positives I have looked at are that I wouldn't have to go through 3 pregnancies, I would have missed out on buying diapers for 2 kids, missed out on buying formula for 2 kids......look at all the money we saved already :) Maybe this was a little test to see how ready we are? All in all it is all good, and we continue on in our faith. I know I am such the optimist aren't I?
Thanks again for all your support, I don't know what I would do without such support from our family & friends.
In Christ,
Jodi

8/3/06 from Jodi
Hi Denise,

I pray everyday for you and your Mom, and those babies. I hope you are hanging in there. You are an incredible woman!!

I know Michael emailed you, but I spoke with Robyn today and she told me that there were a few family members that came forward this week. I wasn't sure if you knew about them? She said some were from Georgia even.

She said not to get too discouraged by that, as they haven't gone through a background check or anything yet, or fully committed to all 3 of them. She said the paper work would take 3 - 12 months and that if it did work out, we might be able to take them as foster children through some of the paperwork process.

We are praying for the right thing in this situation. As we know this would be a huge undertaking, but we would be blessed with His 3 precious gifts. Michael had been talking about adoption before I was ready to go down that road. I knew that coming up with $10 - $15K to adopt, just wasn't in our budget. I wasn't really aware of the state adoption option. That really spoke to my heart. Kids really needing a home, that were even possibly abandoned or abused. Both Michael and I grew up without dads, so we know about abandonment. We were so blessed with awesome moms and we turned out to be successful adults in spite of living in a one parent home. When I got your email from Louise, it was after a prayer that went like this......."Lord, if you really want us to consider this adoption thing, you are going to have to drop a baby in my lap". He doesn't listen all that well, I didn't say babies :)

If you can shed any light on the latest developments with the families coming forward, that would be great. We would also be interested in hearing some of the history behind why the kids were taken away from their mother and if there has been any major emotional effect on them.

Louise wanted me to send you this picture of Michael and Tony Plagman (the beard on Michael was a baseball thing during playoffs - he started growing it, they won, so he wouldn't shave it until they lost), and I also enclosed a picture of the two of us from our wedding.



We will continue for God to be in control of this situation and the best thing for these little babies. We will also pray for your strength and for your mom's hopeful remission.

If you have time to call we would love to talk to you.

PS - Shaheen is Lebanese, but lots of people think it is Irish.

God Bless,
Jodi & Michael Shaheen

8/4 from Denise

Jodi

I don't know anything about the family members that have come forward -- except my niece's dad called me and was quite nasty -- acting like I was the one taking the kids away -- I referred him to Robyn for the truth. I know he has family in GA -- but he personally would be considered unfit.
I'm sorry -- but the picture you sent could not possibly be Tony Plagman -- he is about 8 years old and maybe 4 1/2 feet tall! At least that is the way I remember him! How do they grow so fast?
You look like Skylah in your wedding picture -- blue eyed blonde -- I thought maybe Shaheen was far eastern -- somewhere exotic! That would have been my second guess!
I will talk to Robyn tomorrow and see what information I can get ...
Denise

8/1/06 from Michael

Denise,

I spoke to Robyn last night. It went very well. She said that Sept. 13th is a big day. We are willing to take in all three kids. We are very excited about the opportunity. We will pray a lot. God has a plan for all of us. Can you possibly send pictures of the kids? Is there anything that you can tell us about the situation that they have been through over the past few years? What ever you can tell us would be great. Thank you for this opportunity.

God bless you,
Mike and Jodi


PS. We are big Red Sox fans, but we can root for the Cubbies too.

8/4/06 from Denise

Hi --My niece is 21 and delivered her third child six months ago. The first two kids (Joshua and Skylah) have a different father from the new baby (Shawn Michael). Both fathers are felons -- one currently doing time and the other on the run. Their mother is the victim of abuse and neglect growing up and I have a lot of compassion for her but know she will never be able to parent these kids. Joshua was born with Meth in his system and the kids were removed from the family and Josh went into a foster home for 6 months and my mother took Skylah -- they were eventually returned to my niece but she and her boyfriend abused Josh and CPS took them away. They gave my mom custody of the kids and when she was diagnosed with cancer -- it fell to me....We started therapy for the two older kids today (they are only 2 & 3) but we believe they have attachment issues and for good reason -- they have been tossed around a lot in their short lives. They are in need of a lot of attention and love! And Josh needs a really good dad -- he is ALL boy and he has me wrapped pretty tight around his little finger. They are beautiful children (we really don't have any ugly kids in our family ) They don't think Josh has any long term effects from the Meth -- and they both seem fairly bright to me -- Skylah is really gorgeous -- looks a bit like Jodi in your wedding picture!We took custody of their mother's two younger sisters when they were 5 & 6 years old -- we have had a few minor issues with the girls over the years and they required some therapy -- but they are remarkable young ladies today. Taking custody of them required a real miracle from the Lord and I know He went before us through the whole process....we will keep praying.I will try and get a few pictures to you soon -- I have been taking them so they would have some for their baby books anyways! We have Shawn on tape trying to crawl - he is close! I will talk to Robin tomorrow and see what is going on......the process can be frustrating -- but it has gotten better over the years with more emphasis on what is best for the kids instead of the parents...Blessings....Denise

8/4/06 Michael writes:

Denise,

Thank you for the information. You are a great woman to adopt the girls and also help with Skylah, Joshua and Shawn Michael. Jodi spoke with Robyn yesterday and was told that someone in the family will be trying to adopt the kids if they are taken away from their mom. Although that may be a little disappointing for us, it would be exciting for the family. We will continue to pray that the children find a loving, Christ-centered home. Louise has been great to us. She calls and gives us support all the time. Jodi and I will be attending adoption classes soon so that we will be prepared for anything. We have been called by God to adopt children that need a lot of love. In Georgia, they call the type of adoption we are seeking “special needs”. We have no problem adopting a child that is 3 or 4 years of age and has had parents that have mistreated them. My wife Jodi is a very special woman and will be a fabulous mom. I hope that you have a good weekend with your mom and the kids.

God bless you,
Mike

8/5/06
We are signed up for the 1st step in the adoption process in Georgia. There is a 2 hour orientation meeting that we are attending next Tuesday. Then that is followed by 6 weeks of classes that meet once a week, we will probably do the Saturday class. Then that is followed up with paperwork and 3 home visits, which is the most extensive of the process. This whole process, if you strictly stay on task, takes about 6 months. So we feel that we should do it to prepare if this adoption opportunity falls through. Also, it will prepare us for the CA adoption, and be a good process for us to go through.

The birth mother of these children definitely wants her kids back. She has been in some sort of a home I believe, maybe like a half way house, as a court order. I think we need to pray for her as well.

If you can pray for this whole situation it would be appreciated.

Pray for Denise’s mother, the great grandmother, as she battles Leukemia
Pray for strength for Denise as she takes care of her mother, and those babies.
Pray for Skylah and Joshua as they go to therapy and work through the challenges of the life they have lived so far
Pray for Shawn Michael the 6 month old, that God protected his little body while his mother used crystal meth while she was pregnant
Pray that God protected all their little souls as their parents abused them
Pray that the birth mother gets the help she needs to lead a normal life
Pray that the judge keeps the best interest of these children in mind
Pray for California Family and Protective Services and their decision making
Pray for Michael and I that we are open to this process, and if the lesson is only in the process, and not the end result, that we can be alright with that

8/9/06

Hi Jodi --Apparently relatives from GA (of all places) have been calling and leaving mean messages on the social workers voice mail saying they would take the kids before they would let her adopt them out -- but none of them left phone numbers for her to return their calls! Only a great - grandmother left a contact number. Robyn (the social worker) said none of them looked to promising -- but I will keep you posted. Did she contact you about applying as foster parents? She was looking into that to see what you would need to do. If she hasn't -- maybe you should give her a call and leave a message for her. We are really on hold until the Sept. 13th court date -- hopefully they will release the kids at that time -- I hope and pray they don't keep them on hold for 6 more months -- it is not fair to them. Keep praying!Denise